


Feeling faint

by Ezzy_GodWizardSasukePirateOfBritannia



Category: Stray Kids (Band)
Genre: Angst, Illnesses, Lee Felix-centric, M/M, Minor Bang Chan/Kim Woojin, Minor Han Jisung | Han/Lee Minho | Lee Know, Minor Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin, Pain, Seo Changbin is Whipped
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-09
Updated: 2018-12-19
Packaged: 2019-07-08 17:40:04
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,895
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15935189
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ezzy_GodWizardSasukePirateOfBritannia/pseuds/Ezzy_GodWizardSasukePirateOfBritannia
Summary: Me basically pushing my low blood pressure effects onto felix, but adding internal bleeding. I know, I'm so sorry for hurting our precious sunshine. Changbin is soft and just wants him to be ok and Bang Chan is a concerned parent™.Notice: I am not a medic and do not know what would really be more realistic so please keep that in mind. The low pressure symptoms are things I have so for that I'm just basing it off of my experience.





	1. Felix's condition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix explains what happens to him Ig

Felix had low blood pressure.                           

He's always had it, it wasn't something new. Even as a child, he struggled having to run laps but it got better because along the way he learnt tricks to be okay. 

It was different now though. He had debuted with Stray Kids and was in the middle of promotion for their second album ' _I am who'._ He'd have trouble hiding this fact from his beloved members, not wanting to worry them. But after practice, when the light headedness started to kick in, he would take out his trusty packets of sugar and shove them in his mouth when they weren't paying attention. 

It wasn't easy to keep it a secret in the dorms. Especially when Chan called from the kitchen, announcing that dinner was ready. Jeongin would bounce out of bed and rush to the kitchen. Felix got up and instantly got hit with the fainting feeling, he managed to walk a few steps, sustaining himself on the door frame as black spots danced in his eyes. He would wait a few seconds for his vision to return to normal again before walking to the table, smiling cheerfully at his members.

It wasn't easy keeping it a secret when he was having a shower and the members waited for him. The heat of the water or the hair dryer would eventually make him feel sick so he had to sit down ontop of the closed toilet, regaining his senses and biting his lip to return color to it before going to the kitchen to get his blood pressure back up, knowing that the members would worry for him if they saw him with a pale face.

 

It definitely wasn't easy when guests came over. His members would yell at him to come greet the guest and he didn't have time to stall on the door frame until his vision was fine so he'd lean against the wall and wait for the guest to greet everyone before he himself had to greet the said guest. He'd had a near miss with this sort of occurance once.

Minhos grandmother had come for a visit, she was the sweetest old lady Felix had ever met. Felix probably spent more time with her than minho when she came over. It was the same as usual at first. Minho announced that his grandmother was there, Felix got up from bed and had to lean for a milisecond before going out to greet her. She had already gone and hugged everyone as Felix got there. Suddenly, his legs felt like jelly and he was sure he'd collapse as the old lady made her way over to him, he was sure she was smiling even though he couldn't see it because of the black spots. She patiently waited for a hug as Felix started to shake a bit violently, his vision not returning for what seemed like forever, although it had probably been barely a minute. The members weren't paying attention so they didn't notice, by a hair. Felix returned to his senses right as the lady spoke. He smiled at her and gave her a warm hug before trotting over to the living room and plopping himself down on the couch, restless.

His members didn't notice anything though. Oh no; for them nothing seemed strange. Felix was always bright and bubbly and healthy. They had no idea how he almost collapsed every time he stood up after sitting down for too long or after practicing hard. Or how he had to sneak sugary stuff into his system every other hour, trying to keep himself from collapsing. Or even how it felt impossible to go through an entire concert, going on adrenaline alone and having to shove four packets of sugar into his mouth after finishing or sneak one in in between costume changes. Not even changbin, his best friend and possibly crush, although he didn't want to admit anything because he knew how conservative Korea was. Nothing like Australia. Although, he had seen Chan and Woojin cuddled up pretty close the other day. And Jisung and Minho had fought less and were draped over eachother, watching movies. And the longing stares Hyunjin seemed to give Seungmin every other minute.

Felix had noticed all this. But he had only realised something else that happened to him, totally unrelated to his low blood pressure,  when it hit him in the face. 

It had been a good day so far; Felix had only felt like collapsing once that morning and it was starting to be late afternoon. Until, of course, disaster striked. He suddenly had a coughing fit, feeling as if something was clogging his esophagus, more or less right in between his lungs. Then he opened his eyes, noticing the blood on his hand and he rushed to the bathroom, yelling something about going to freshen up at the members who were cleaning the practice room up, packing up for the day.

He spent around ten minutes wheezing into the toilet, blood spurting out of his mouth. He knew it couldn't possibly be a punctured lung because he felt absolutely no pain in the lung area, aside from the backlash of wheezing and coughing so much that he was gasping for air. It probably had something to do with his esophagus, he figured. Because when he stopped coughing and went to clean up the blood, he took a sip of water and felt a sting as the water slid down, having difficulty swallowing it down. 

Felix returned to the practice room, smiling happily as he grabbed his bag and followed the members back to the dorm room where he plopped onto his bed and did something he probably shouldn't have done; search his symptoms up on the internet. After reading just about every single article he could find he figured that he probably had a ruptured esophagus and that if it wasn't grave it would heal on its own. He had also found out how it had been caused; he had probably swallowed something he shouldn't have or done something along the lines. The side effects weren't particularly nasty: Fever, swallowing issues, moderate chest pain, trapped air, hurting after vomiting or retching, difficulty breathing and excessive sweating. Bleeding wasn't supposed to be frequent if it wasn't a grave rupture, which he hoped was the case. He was happy to find out that in most cases it healed on its own after 7-10. Perfect: Felix would just have to hide it for a bit more than week and see how it went before deciding if he should visit the doctor. He stood up happily, wanting to change into comfortable pyjamas before suddenly remembering his low blood pressure and collapsing onto the bed, his knees and feet on the floor as he breathed in, waiting to be stable enough to stand up. Luckily, Jeongin wasn't in the room to witness his hyung clinging onto the bed sheets and looking pale.

Unluckily for him, Woojin had just decided to walk in and tell Felix that dinner was ready. "Hey Lix, just wanted to tell you that we finished making dinner so- Wait. Why are you leaning onto the bed like that?" He questioned, a bit amused at the predicament of the younger male. Felix chuckled. "something fell under my bed, don't worry about it" he replied with ease. Woojin nodded, although Felix couldn't see him. "Alrightie. Well, we'll be waiting for you at the table " Woojin said before walking out. Felix let out the breath he was holding before standing up and heading to the dinner table, sitting besides changbin, as per usual, and clapping at the sight of the delicious food Chan had made.

This is when he encountered his first problem. 

Felix knew that he needed food to keep his blood pressure high and so he tried eating at least two courses a day, and he coukd admit that he sneaked tons of snacks inbetween meals. Even if he knew about his blood pressure issues, he almost always skipped breakfast because it made him feel sick, aside from a few occasions when they went out. He moved his chopsticks to the meat pile after the older members had begun; grabbing a strip of the beef and shoving it in his mouth, having difficulty swallowing it. He hit his chest a few times, trying to get it down until it did so, stinging the rupture a bit. "You okay Lix?" Chan asked with concern, eyeing the other Aussie. Felix flashed him a grin "yup! Just need to drink a bit of water is all" he replied as he grabbed his glass of water and took a sip. Chan just nodded, casting him a look before returning to his animated conversation with Woojin the teddy bear.

Felix had managed to eat a plausible amount of food, that would keep him standing at least. He could down the soft food, mostly,  but he'd had to chew the harder things relentlessly before swallowing them. This action limited his talking and participation in the meal which was a new sight for the members. To them, he appeared lost in thought as he stared down at his food, chewing. He then suddenly stood up, cleaning his plate before excusing himself from the table, announcing that he was tired and worn out from practice; which was partly true. 

As soon as he was in the safety of his own room he threw himself onto his bed, burying his head into his pillow. A few minutes later the door creaked and in walked Changbin, his short figure was visible thanks to the light coming from the hallway. He sat down next to Felix, patting the younger boys back as Felix turned to look at him, his lips curling up into a smile."Hey" he said, his voice sounded hoarse and tired. Changbin smiled back before speaking "Is everything ok Felix?".  _Oh crap. Changbin was catching onto him._ Felix nodded as he shifted around to lay his head on his hyungs lap. Changbin started threading his fingers into the Australians hair, humming happily before touching his forehead. "Lix, you're burning up and you're extremely sweaty, like a soaking amount of sweat is protruding from your pour" he exagerated a bit as he grabbed a tissue from the bedside table and cleaned his hand from said sweat. "I'll get one of those fever towels to keep your temperature stable but you really should rest" Changbin ushered him. The next few minutes were a bit blurry for Felix. Usually,  when he sweated so much he would then start to feel weak and light headed. Even so, he could tell that changbin was stripping him of his pants and shirt before sliding his pajamas onto him. He felt his consciousness slipping away as warm covers enveloped him and a towel was placed on his forehead. He could almost swear that he'd felt a pair of lips on his cheek before completely losing consciousness and dozing off, falling into a kind of stupor.


	2. Secret keeping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Felix has to hide what's happening to him, knowing it'd be really burdensome to take care of him.

**_A.N:_ ** _I'm wondering if yall want smut to happen, which would take an extra chapter. Please tell me because if not I'll take the explicit rating off._

 

 

 

Felix slipped back into consciousness and his eyes fluttered open. He looked over at the digital alarm clock on his bedside table and grimaced. It was 6:50 am. He was now way too awake to fall back asleep though. Felix sighed; he shouldn't have given in and fallen asleep as early as he had last night. He looked over at Jeongins bed and was surprised to find it with two extra people: Hyunjin and Seungmin. He blinked once, lost in thought before a sudden movement jerked him out if his thoughts. He looked down at the floor and smiled, seeing two futons. One with Woojin and Chan, and the other with Jisung and Minho. His face softened; they had probably forced Jeongin to let them sleep with Felix once they had heard that he had a fever. He yawned and closed his eyes, thinking he could fall back asleep before stiffening. 

_Oh shit, I really need to pee._

Felix groaned internally. He could try to make a silent escape but, in reality, he knew that he was still pretty darn weak and tired so if he stood up right then and there, he would probably collapse as he tried to regain stableness, waking up all the members in the progress. Another thing that just happened to be in his way; Changbins hand, that was on top of his hand, that was underneath Changbins that was-

Ok, he really needed to calm the fuck down. His mind blanked for a second as he stared at the beautiful sleeping boy that for some reason was holding his hand. Felix's lip was forming a pout as he realised that Changbin had slept in a chair all night. 

Felix had been so lost in his own thoughts of Changbins discomfort that he hadn't even seen the boy open his eyes and stare at him. Well, at least not until Felix himself looked back and realised that his hyung was awake. "Sorry for waking you up hyung" Felix whispered, his voice as deep as always, yet a bit hoarse. Changbin managed to smile and shake his head.

"Uhhhh, I really, desperately, need to pee" Felix muttered after a few moments of silence, in which Changbins hand didn't move from its resting place. The black haired boy stood up silently and opened his dongsaengs covers, lifting the boy up and carrying him bridal style to the bathroom. "I don't think you should overexert yourself" Changbin finally spoke once they were away from sleeping ears.

  _Ah, my prince charming saves me from collapsing._

Felix flashed him a smile "Thanks hyung" He muttered before getting gently placed on the ground, pretending to lose his footing so he could lean against the wall and stop himself from falling with a plausible excuse. He then scurried off into the bathroom to do his business. While doing so he rubbed his chest and thought for a bit.  _What was he feeling at the moment? What symptoms did he have?_

He felt a light chest pain but other than that there there didn't seem to be anything worth healing or taking a pain killer for. Felix walked back out of the bathroom after washing his hands and was greeted by a tired Changbin that was rubbing his sore back.

"Uhm" Changbin looked up, waiting for the younger male to continue "You can sleep in my bed with me if you want. I don't want your back to be sore for practice" he offered kindly.

The payback was truly wonderful. Changbin gave him a warm smile as he carried him back to the room and got in bed with him. When they were tucked back in bed Felix realised it might've not been that smart. Why, you may ask? Well, because Felix, as stated earlier, was very much awake and Changbin very much wasn't.  His breath would hitch whenever he felt Changbins own breath tickle his neck and therefore send shivers down his spine, making a chain reaction over and over until Felix had just had enough of it. He turned over and looked at the sleeping Changbin before burying his head into the olders chest and forcing himself to fall asleep once more.

It sort of worked out.

The next time he opened his eyes it was 7:55 am. A bit more than an hour had passed. This time he let out an audible groan that was muffled by Changbins chest. Felix bit his lip, hoping he hadn't woken any of the members up. 

"Hey"

Felix flinched, he wasn't expecting anyone to be awake, he unwillingly let go of Changbin and looked around before spotting Chan, sitting on a chair with a mug of coffee in his hands. 

 "If you want I'll make breakfast for everyone" Chan offered, smiling as he took another sip of the warm brown liquid. As stated before, Felix didn't really enjoy breakfast. But he hadn't really eaten the night before so it was better to give in to Chans offer.

A gentle smile graced Felix's face and he decided to take the challenge of getting up since he was feeling a little bit better. He didn't stumble and he didn't fall.

"Oh thank god" Felix muttered, making Chan arch an eyebrow as he looked over the younger boy. Lix was a bit flustered but nevertheless he walked out of the room, surprised to find Woojin following after him. "You guys really aren't as quiet as you think you are" he muttered groggily as he tried taming his hair while joining Chan in the kitchen. Felix smiled, watching the two as he sat patiently at the table, joined by his members one by one.

The two unofficial team parents made porridge together, which just happened to be perfect for their Sick Boy™. Felix happily ate as much as he could, ignoring the sting here and there. As he ate he sneaked a look over at Changbin, who seemed a bit more rested after sleeping in an actual bed. 

"At what time does our schedule start?" Felix asked after finishing his bowl of porridge. "I asked them to clear most of it so you would be able to be 100% better but they kept the 11 am dance practice and a few of us have to work for an hour or so on producing, but aside from that we should be free and able to rest" Woojin explained as his right hand moved and draped itself over Chans shoulder. "Thanks hyung, for taking care of me" he said quietly, earning him shouts of appreciation on his manners from minho. 

Changbin scoffed beside him "what else would we do? Let you suffer in the depths of your sickness?" He exaggerated, pinching the youngers cheeks and talking about how cute he was. Felix couldn't help but smile at his loving family.

 

_10:40 am, at the dance studio_

 

Felix grinned as they started stretching and setting everything up for practice. He was feeling better after a good nights rest, something he hadn't had in a while. Then, he felt the clogging feeling again. "Hey guys?" Eight heads turned to look at uim "I'm just going to go to the bathroom before practice starts, don't really want to interrupt practice" he explained, earning an appreciative nod from Chan. 

Felix knew that he was bound to cough blood at least the first few days. Because, honestly, he had a ruptured esophagus so blood made sense. He thought about it; the day before he'd only coughed blood once so he could expect that to always happen. Good, very good, great infact. He'd get better in a little bit more than a week and wouldnt cough blood every minute. 

He exited the bathroom after cleaning the corners of his mouth, coughing again as he reached the dance studio. There wasn't any blood on his hand so that was a good sign. He opened the dance studio door at 10:47 am and gave his members his usual cheerful smile.

"Hey Felix?" 

Felix hummed in response, giving Seungmin a quizzical look.

"Why's there blood coming from your mouth?" 

Changbin had asked Felix instead of Seungmin. 

Felix looked over at the mirror and saw a trickle of blood going from his mouth to the tip of his chin. He watched as a drop made its way through and splattered on the floor. Internally, he was irritated at himself. He should've wiped his mouth to check if he really was blood free before going inside. 

In the corner of his eye, he saw Chan standing up to go check on him. He was a few steps away when Felix wiped the blood with the back of his hand. "I just cut the inside of my lip by accident, It's all -" "that doesn't look like a cut lip" Chan cut in " It's all okay. Now let's get to practice shall we?" Felix said, walking over to the stereo and starting the music.

Instantly after practice had finished Chan walked over to Felix. 

_Oh shit, I really need to have sugar right now though, please let this be quick_

"Are you sure you're doing fine?" Chan asked him, in English, of course it was in English. Chan always did that when he was talking seriously with Felix, or just to make the boy feel comfortable. "Yeah mate, I'm doing fine" "Are you su-" "Yes I'm sure Chris" Felix cut in warmly, patting Chans shoulder. He just needed to get to his sugar stash or he would start seeing spots again.

"I'm going to go freshen up now"

"Just one moment"

_Oh god, can't he just let me go, like now_

"I'll be watching over you, and Woojin will be as well ok? Don't be scared of coming to us for anything?"

Felix nodded before opening his mouth, stupidly.

_Don't say anything, don't say anything. You need to go now._

Of course, he said something

"What are you and Woojin anyway?" Felix asked rather abrubtly

Chan scrunched his eyebrow "we're friends, members,  ~~stray kids parents~~ "

"Ah Ok" And without wasting another second, Felix was outta there and on his sugar stash, keeping himself healthy, or at least trying to.

He spent the rest of the day on the couch with Changbin sat down beside him as the two of them watched TV and talked about whatever came to mind. The older boy threaded his fingers through Felix's hair, whose head was reasting on Bins lap and his legs were curled up; it was a fun afternoon that they spent together.

 


	3. The reveal *dun dun dun*

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I’m back bitches. Love yall, sorry for being absent. Anyway our boys find out that Felix is a sick duck.

Felix woke up from his much-deserved nap feeling cold, and lonely. He patted the spot where his best friend had been sitting only to be greeted with the leather    of the couch. He groaned, opening his eyes and looking around.

The lamp in the corner of the room was lit, the only source of light at the moment. Where were his members? 

He groggily stood up and rubbed circles into his chest absentmindedly, only then realising that he felt oddly warm. This was not a fever, he could tell. But it was like feeling healed. 

Felix smiled to himself, thinking that the rupture ordeal would finally be over.

After all, it had been almost two weeks since then.

Ok but, seriously, where were his members? 

He stepped into his room, needing to cover his eyes from the light. Jeongin was on his bed, working on some homework. 

“Hey” Felix greeted, surprised when his voice came out as rough and clearing his throat before repeating.

The younger boy smiled at him 

“Hey” he said, softly.

Felix threw himself onto his bed, relishing in the softness of the covers he himself had chosen.

”The others were thinking about going on a walk, wanna join?”

Felix hummed in response, thinking about it.

”But it’s too hoooooot” he whined.

A moment later he gave in though, agreeing to join them on this excursion through the dangerous summer land of Seoul. (He had experienced much worse in Australia but any chance to whine was one he’d gladly take)

Felix got up and left their air conditioned room, Jeongin followed suit.

Having left the cold cove that was their room, they greeted the other members who they found to be waiting for them.

 

Felix really hated sweating, he hated it with such a burning passion that he would gladly take any freezing Australian winter over having to sweat. 

Ok, maybe that was exaggerating a bit considering that winter in Australia which he was used to wasn’t nearly as cold as it was in Seoul and he also didn’t mind sweating during practice because that was struggle sweat.

But like this, in the open streets with no such thing as a gentle breeze to save him, and his clothes would stick to his skin and just ew.

Not to mention that these kinds of excursions usually brought about a fainting episode. They just seemed to go hand in hand, really. So that was just brilliant.

Halfway through this walk, Felix realised just how dumb he had been not to fill up on sugar earlier but it was definitely too late now. 

They entered a big store at Minhos request, something about needing to stock up on shirts. He didn’t pay attention to that though, not when Changbin had gently tugged on his sleeve and asked him to accompany him on a search for hoodies.

Felix, of course, gladly obliged.

Somewhere along the search, hoodies had turned into jeans and hats and whatnot so they ended up in the changing rooms.

After seeing Changbin trying on what seemed like the 4th jumper (which, to be honest, he didn’t even understand why he was trying on jumpers. It was definitely not jumper season yet) he started to see dancing black spots.

He groaned, which earned him an ‘Are you okay’ from bin.

Fuck this. He was leaning on the wall and hoping to push through but then he realised that he really could not stay standing.

An image of a stool in the changing room flashed through his mind

“Open up, I need to sit down right now or I’ll collapse” He didn’t know how he had managed to say that, but he had.

Felix leaned against the door, knowing where it was purely by touching it. He heard the lock click and threw himself onto the stool, breathing heavily as sounds around him slowly started to disappear, leaving him only with the sound of his own breathing.

He felt a hand on his cheek but was too tired to react, his body was shaking.

Just then, an employee who had been helping Changbin out earlier passed, seeing Felix sick and running over.

”Is there anything you need?”

”Uh, I think I remember seeing some vending machines, could you please get him some water” Changbin told her as another employee came over.

She was a middle aged plump woman who sported dark red hair and thick rimmed black glasses. “I think I have some sweets in the front desk, Ill bring them to you”

Felix only made a throaty sound in response.

When the ladies had left he couldn’t even relish in the feeling of Changbin rubbing circles into the back of his hand. 

“I guess it was too hot to go out”

If he had any energy left, he would’ve snorted at that. It was an excellent idea though, he would be able to play it off as the summer day being too hot. 

Of course, though, he just had to go and be dumb by revealing his low blood pressure.

After drinking some water and gobbling up the cola flavoured sweets he slowly went back to normal.

”Are you better now?” The red haired lady asked kindly, to which he nodded in response. 

“Yep, whenever I have sugar lows, so basically always, I have sugar or sweets. I’ll be sure to drink a coke later though”

Not as soon as he had said that he slapped a hand over his mouth, his eyes looking over at Changbin, who frowned but said nothing.

He grimaced, imagining the conversation they’d have later.

The dreaded conversation only came after dinner, when they were sat in a corner of the room away from all the other members.

”So, sugar lows, huh?”

”Yeah, I have low blood pressure, like faint-every-other-time-I-get-up low” 

Changbin sighed, which was somehow worse than him getting mad.

”You could’ve told at least me”

”I didn’t want you to get worried”

”Yes, well, I was really worried today but at least I would’ve known what to do”

”The ladies were there to help you though” he retorted, a bit quietly.

Changbin arched up an eyebrow

”And if you had fainted? Would we have dragged you back to the dorm. You don’t look it but it’s tiring to carry you”

Felix snorted at the image.

”Any other illness you’ve been hiding from us for ever? Aside from the fact that you dancing until 4 am almost every night probably doesn’t help you out mate” Chans voice cut in. 

Felix groaned, turning to see Chan and, predictably, Woojin, looking over at him after seemingly eavesdropping on their conversation.

”N-“ he grimaced, remembering. “Well, I may have ruptured my esophagus two weeks ago”

”YOU RUPTURED YOUR WHAT?” Chan exclaimed as Woojin burst out laughing, earning looks from the other members who were now part of this conversation.

“Is it healed now?” Changbin questioned 

“Well, yeah, I think it is. I’m not sure though since I cant look at it” Felix said as he scrunched up his nose.

”Did you not have it checked?” Seungmin asked and Felix, yet again, grimaced.

”Would you be mad if I said no?”

”Lee Felix!” Woojin exclaimed, exasperated.

”How did you even know what it was then?” Minho asked, not lifting his eyes from Jisungs broken hoodie which he was fixing.

”Well.... I may have searched it up on the internet”

That earned him a lot of, as the members would call them, ‘tired of his shit’ sounds.

This was going to be a long night.

 

 

 


End file.
